1 00:00:10,547 --> 00:00:12,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There we go. 2 00:00:13,267 --> 00:00:15,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And we'll play from the current slide. 3 00:00:16,587 --> 00:00:17,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right. Hello, everybody. 4 00:00:20,067 --> 00:00:24,229 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): If you were not in the first session, this will be the first half of this 5 00:00:24,229 --> 00:00:27,379 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): presentation will be nearly identical to the first one. 6 00:00:27,379 --> 00:00:31,316 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The second-half I'm going to focus on the the slides I didn't get to, 7 00:00:31,316 --> 00:00:34,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): so I'll sort of skim over the other part. So if you want to. 8 00:00:35,107 --> 00:00:36,787 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): See more detail on the. 9 00:00:38,867 --> 00:00:42,674 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): 3rd, 3/4, third, fourth of the talk content. 10 00:00:42,674 --> 00:00:48,257 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Go watch the other one. All right. So without further ado, hello, 11 00:00:48,257 --> 00:00:53,587 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I am Steven Trimbeck. This is Deep Meaning at work. This is a. 12 00:00:54,067 --> 00:00:58,922 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Practical philosophical talk about addressing the the challenges that come 13 00:00:58,922 --> 00:01:03,389 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): with being alive as a human being, needing to make money to survive, 14 00:01:03,389 --> 00:01:08,051 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but also kind of wanting to enjoy the ride and get something out of it. 15 00:01:08,051 --> 00:01:10,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Most of this will relate to work. 16 00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:14,837 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Not all of it directly. Generally I I don't see any separation 17 00:01:14,837 --> 00:01:18,197 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): between work and life. That's my personal perspective. 18 00:01:18,197 --> 00:01:22,719 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So while a lot of these things do not make a direct correlation to a work 19 00:01:22,719 --> 00:01:26,874 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): problem or some sort of goal, I think you guys will be able to draw 20 00:01:26,874 --> 00:01:28,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): those correlations yourselves. 21 00:01:28,707 --> 00:01:33,586 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it will make sense. OK, cool. So all this stuff is practical. 22 00:01:33,586 --> 00:01:37,948 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I just drew from like my own notes and journals and stuff. 23 00:01:37,948 --> 00:01:43,345 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is what has worked for me. So all of this is is first hand now like 24 00:01:43,345 --> 00:01:45,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): everything I borrowed and. 25 00:01:45,267 --> 00:01:49,040 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Drew from many different sources. Nothing is is truly unique. 26 00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:53,360 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So take it and make it your own. And all of the things that we'll talk 27 00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:56,585 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): about today, I mean the the good section is meant to 28 00:01:56,585 --> 00:01:59,993 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): be practiced. You know, none of it should be, you know, 29 00:01:59,993 --> 00:02:01,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): earth-shaking or. 30 00:02:01,107 --> 00:02:03,734 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It should feel familiar and it's meant to be done. 31 00:02:03,734 --> 00:02:06,155 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Just looking at it isn't going to do anything. 32 00:02:06,155 --> 00:02:09,966 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It has to be practiced day in and day out. Alright, so let's get started. 33 00:02:09,966 --> 00:02:14,138 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And by the way, if you have any questions, you can just come off mute and ask if 34 00:02:14,138 --> 00:02:16,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): something really doesn't make sense or. 35 00:02:16,147 --> 00:02:19,508 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I glossed over something. Feel free to to just talk. 36 00:02:19,508 --> 00:02:23,757 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is not super formal. Otherwise I will reserve like 10 minutes 37 00:02:23,757 --> 00:02:26,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): or so at the end for questions and answers. 38 00:02:28,467 --> 00:02:31,363 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right, So what this talk is about going to 39 00:02:31,363 --> 00:02:35,862 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): address. If you haven't read the abstract, the premise is pretty simple. 40 00:02:35,862 --> 00:02:40,854 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There are large-scale societal challenges, and these are not separate from work. 41 00:02:40,854 --> 00:02:43,627 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): They bleed into our work because, as I said, 42 00:02:43,627 --> 00:02:48,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I don't see any separation between life and work. You're the same person. 43 00:02:48,427 --> 00:02:51,786 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Yes, we put on roles, we behave a little bit differently, 44 00:02:51,786 --> 00:02:56,361 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but that's that's fine. Fundamentally, you are the same person and how you are 45 00:02:56,361 --> 00:03:00,936 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): in one domain of your life profoundly affects how you are in all the others to 46 00:03:00,936 --> 00:03:05,627 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): a degree that I think we we forget about until we start making positive changes. 47 00:03:05,747 --> 00:03:11,895 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So most of this is just about stuff that I did over the past few years, 48 00:03:11,895 --> 00:03:18,812 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): especially over the last six months or so on a personal quest to try to enjoy my 49 00:03:18,812 --> 00:03:20,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): time and find meaning in. 50 00:03:20,947 --> 00:03:25,661 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Even boring moments doing stuff I don't want to do, especially those moments. 51 00:03:25,661 --> 00:03:30,254 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And I wanted to didn't want to settle for a life that was just pretty good. 52 00:03:30,254 --> 00:03:34,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And then I had to go for go to work and it was conditionally good. You know, 53 00:03:34,907 --> 00:03:39,621 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): if I got what I wanted or I was working on something I liked or with people I 54 00:03:39,621 --> 00:03:40,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): liked, it was. 55 00:03:40,587 --> 00:03:45,590 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Fine, but otherwise I dreaded it. I wanted to move towards an existence 56 00:03:45,590 --> 00:03:50,385 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): where it's pretty much good. There is something valuable about every 57 00:03:50,385 --> 00:03:53,651 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): moment, and so this is basically recounting my 58 00:03:53,651 --> 00:03:58,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): personal experience and what I've learned along the way. It's not. 59 00:03:58,307 --> 00:04:01,670 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The only way, by all means, I'm open to other things. 60 00:04:01,670 --> 00:04:05,906 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Like I said in the first talk, I am a human experiment in progress. 61 00:04:05,906 --> 00:04:10,390 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): These are my results so far. Take what you like. All right, here we go. 62 00:04:10,390 --> 00:04:14,563 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Here's what's on the label. You're going to learn how to be happy, 63 00:04:14,563 --> 00:04:16,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): regardless of circumstances. 64 00:04:16,427 --> 00:04:20,578 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Feel connected to your work and the people around you gracefully navigate, 65 00:04:20,578 --> 00:04:24,398 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): change in and out of work. And none of the stuff we're going to talk 66 00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:28,715 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): about requires you to change anything about what you actually do in your job. 67 00:04:28,715 --> 00:04:31,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Now you can, and you may, but I would recommend. 68 00:04:31,507 --> 00:04:34,748 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Trying these changes first to see where that leads you, 69 00:04:34,748 --> 00:04:38,337 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and then if you want to go forward and make external changes, 70 00:04:38,337 --> 00:04:41,694 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): change your new role, learn new skills, change companies. 71 00:04:41,694 --> 00:04:45,572 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I have absolutely no problem with saying you're miserable. I mean, 72 00:04:45,572 --> 00:04:46,787 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): go do something else. 73 00:04:46,987 --> 00:04:50,040 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But try this first, because I think you may find that you 74 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:52,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): don't need a lot of the changes you thought you didn't. 75 00:04:54,307 --> 00:04:57,185 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): OK, so I'm not going to spend a lot of time 76 00:04:57,185 --> 00:05:00,324 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): on the sort of negative current state problems, 77 00:05:00,324 --> 00:05:04,510 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but I think most of us are pretty familiar with this. You know, 78 00:05:04,510 --> 00:05:09,743 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): media and movies and podcasts is these things are all pretty good at describing 79 00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:13,144 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): problems. Not a whole lot of people bring solutions 80 00:05:13,144 --> 00:05:13,667 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): to bear. 81 00:05:14,227 --> 00:05:19,712 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I sought my own and people who are trying to do the same, but it's worth mentioning, 82 00:05:19,712 --> 00:05:22,874 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you know, my view of where we're coming from and 83 00:05:22,874 --> 00:05:26,939 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): what's worth addressing. So there's a lot of technological and 84 00:05:26,939 --> 00:05:29,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): societal change. There's a lot of disruption. 85 00:05:29,987 --> 00:05:35,112 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): A lot of negative emotion and I think more troubling that there is an influx of 86 00:05:35,112 --> 00:05:39,661 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): noise in our lives. Seemingly we are, you know, talking at each other, 87 00:05:39,661 --> 00:05:44,851 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but we feel less and less connected and there's a sort of hollowness to a lot of 88 00:05:44,851 --> 00:05:45,107 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): our. 89 00:05:45,107 --> 00:05:48,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Existence. That's not something you can easily 90 00:05:48,427 --> 00:05:51,676 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): measure, but it the symptoms clearly show up, 91 00:05:51,676 --> 00:05:55,278 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you know, in the form of a mental health crisis or 92 00:05:55,278 --> 00:06:00,787 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): quiet quitting or checking out or, you know, on the other end, extreme anger. 93 00:06:00,867 --> 00:06:03,884 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All these sorts of problems are are really, you know, 94 00:06:03,884 --> 00:06:08,410 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): symptoms of underlying things that are difficult to measure and we don't spend a 95 00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:12,042 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): lot of time thinking about. I'm not going to spend a lot of time 96 00:06:12,042 --> 00:06:15,729 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): talking about it because I don't really like diagnosing problems. 97 00:06:15,729 --> 00:06:18,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is what worked for me and I think at scale. 98 00:06:18,707 --> 00:06:22,255 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It can work for a lot of people. That's up to you to decide. 99 00:06:22,255 --> 00:06:25,803 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But in the face of all those problems, all these challenges, 100 00:06:25,803 --> 00:06:29,410 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): people have a couple basic and very understandable responses. 101 00:06:29,410 --> 00:06:32,667 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There's no judgment in it at all. It's just what we do. 102 00:06:34,707 --> 00:06:38,145 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right, so the first bucket here is comes in two 103 00:06:38,145 --> 00:06:41,053 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): forms, and this is general disillusionment. 104 00:06:41,053 --> 00:06:46,474 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So I can pull up a bunch of quotes that demonstrate what I'm trying to talk about 105 00:06:46,474 --> 00:06:50,705 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): here, but we can capsulate in the quote. Why bother? Who cares? 106 00:06:50,705 --> 00:06:52,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This doesn't matter. 107 00:06:53,347 --> 00:06:54,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It is a sense that. 108 00:06:56,507 --> 00:06:58,546 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm going to do things that are in it for me, 109 00:06:58,546 --> 00:07:00,939 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): or things that are conditional based on the outcomes, 110 00:07:00,939 --> 00:07:04,485 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): whether they help people or they they do something that I like or help somebody 111 00:07:04,485 --> 00:07:04,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): else. 112 00:07:05,427 --> 00:07:08,246 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And if I can't, then I'm going to not do it, 113 00:07:08,246 --> 00:07:12,192 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): or I'm going to be unmotivated. So two general responses here. 114 00:07:12,192 --> 00:07:15,887 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Nihilism is the sense that nothing matters, so why bother? 115 00:07:15,887 --> 00:07:20,898 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Sometimes this descends into hedonism. Just I'm just going to seek pleasure and 116 00:07:20,898 --> 00:07:21,587 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): avoid pain. 117 00:07:22,147 --> 00:07:25,119 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And that's what most of my existence is about. 118 00:07:25,119 --> 00:07:30,177 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm going to do the bare minimum to get by, maybe serve a couple of the values, 119 00:07:30,177 --> 00:07:34,476 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but for the most part, nothing matters, so who cares? And escapism, 120 00:07:34,476 --> 00:07:39,092 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): as I mentioned the first time, is even more dangerous in my opinion of a 121 00:07:39,092 --> 00:07:41,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): world view because it supposes that there. 122 00:07:41,747 --> 00:07:45,960 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Is a better place. You know, there's another job, another company, 123 00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:50,487 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): another life, another, I don't know, another girlfriend or boyfriend or 124 00:07:50,487 --> 00:07:55,266 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): another set of life circumstances that then I'll be happy, then I'll be OK, 125 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:57,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): then it will be good enough. 126 00:07:57,107 --> 00:08:00,039 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And I think we know that that is a lie. In general, 127 00:08:00,039 --> 00:08:04,551 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): if you're above like a baseline, you know, far be it from me to say if you are, 128 00:08:04,551 --> 00:08:07,201 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you know, suffering profoundly from, you know, 129 00:08:07,201 --> 00:08:11,487 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): some like intense like pain disorder or something that you should be happy. 130 00:08:11,487 --> 00:08:14,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But if you're above some basic baseline and it's. 131 00:08:14,307 --> 00:08:18,198 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Not that high of a base of a bar. Then if you are not able to find 132 00:08:18,198 --> 00:08:21,334 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): contentment, you probably will not find it in another 133 00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:23,890 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): thing. Doesn't mean you can't make external 134 00:08:23,890 --> 00:08:26,794 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): changes, but this is a different kind of delusion 135 00:08:26,794 --> 00:08:30,627 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that is very dangerous because unlike nihilism in the sense that. 136 00:08:31,027 --> 00:08:34,224 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You never find peace. You're always looking. That, 137 00:08:34,224 --> 00:08:38,738 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): in my opinion, is doomed to fail. And then there's status quo thinking. 138 00:08:38,738 --> 00:08:43,503 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is the other general bucket. This is believing that either there is no 139 00:08:43,503 --> 00:08:46,387 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): problem or that the problems are conditional. 140 00:08:46,387 --> 00:08:51,351 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Or that you can overcome, you know, large scale problems or changes to ways 141 00:08:51,351 --> 00:08:54,682 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): of being, to changes in your environment and human 142 00:08:54,682 --> 00:08:57,817 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): society, or whatever the problems are simply by 143 00:08:57,817 --> 00:09:01,279 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): working harder, doubling down on traditional success 144 00:09:01,279 --> 00:09:01,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): measures. 145 00:09:02,827 --> 00:09:08,552 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Whatever those may be. Fame, fortune, like people liking what you're doing. 146 00:09:08,552 --> 00:09:12,017 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Followers, please don't get me started on the 147 00:09:12,017 --> 00:09:17,440 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Internet. You know what this looks like. That does not work. And again, 148 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:18,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): these people end up. 149 00:09:19,067 --> 00:09:24,778 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Compensating generally through the same sort of comfort seeking or desire to numb 150 00:09:24,778 --> 00:09:29,375 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): yourself or escape in some way. And I don't think very few people 151 00:09:29,375 --> 00:09:34,459 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): actually believe this on a conscious level. Yeah, so that's that. Again, 152 00:09:34,459 --> 00:09:38,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): neither. None of these are wrong. They make sense, actually. 153 00:09:38,867 --> 00:09:41,900 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Their logical reactions to challenges, to uncertainty. 154 00:09:41,900 --> 00:09:45,209 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): How do you handle uncertainty, especially at the big scale? 155 00:09:45,209 --> 00:09:49,455 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It tends to make you feel powerless, and there aren't that many responses to 156 00:09:49,455 --> 00:09:51,881 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that. People generally make pretty rational 157 00:09:51,881 --> 00:09:54,418 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): decisions. It just doesn't look good when you 158 00:09:54,418 --> 00:09:57,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): multiply that at a large scale for a culture at a company or a. 159 00:09:58,467 --> 00:10:02,198 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Culture for a country. So what can we do? Nope, we're not there yet. 160 00:10:02,198 --> 00:10:06,685 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): We're almost done with this part, though. How do these strategies affect our lives 161 00:10:06,685 --> 00:10:11,173 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and work? I mean, you can see it, right? It it creates an existence that is overly 162 00:10:11,173 --> 00:10:13,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): competitive. It's what's in it for me. 163 00:10:33,227 --> 00:10:37,275 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All sorts of you become vulnerable to all sorts of other problems, 164 00:10:37,275 --> 00:10:41,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): so I don't really need to belabor this point. I think this part is a given. 165 00:10:41,907 --> 00:10:42,667 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Given. 166 00:10:46,627 --> 00:10:49,373 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So here's the more interesting part. So, you know, 167 00:10:49,373 --> 00:10:52,120 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): we met with the same challenges as everybody else. 168 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:56,481 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm just a a fellow human being met with all the same problems over the past few 169 00:10:56,481 --> 00:11:00,197 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): years. Especially like, you know, I I saw that I want to be content, 170 00:11:00,197 --> 00:11:03,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I want to be happy, or at least I want to be OK pretty much 171 00:11:03,427 --> 00:11:04,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): no matter what's going on. 172 00:11:05,347 --> 00:11:09,357 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And I want to find a way to do that within my control. And I mostly got there. 173 00:11:09,357 --> 00:11:11,793 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But you know, work had always been a challenge. 174 00:11:11,793 --> 00:11:15,701 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And but I also wanted to have ambitions. I wanted to do things in the world. 175 00:11:15,701 --> 00:11:19,051 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I wanted to help people. I wanted to learn things and I wanted to 176 00:11:19,051 --> 00:11:21,741 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): be involved. And these two things seem fundamentally 177 00:11:21,741 --> 00:11:22,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): opposed. 178 00:11:22,587 --> 00:11:27,480 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): How do I unify that? How do I be content, but also do stuff and be involved? 179 00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:31,102 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And how do I not go crazy? How do I combat this sense of 180 00:11:31,102 --> 00:11:34,278 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): disconnection? How do I feel connected to my work 181 00:11:34,278 --> 00:11:37,583 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): especially? How do I want to be here in the average 182 00:11:37,583 --> 00:11:38,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): moment? 183 00:11:38,307 --> 00:11:43,003 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So this is what I came up with, and this is what has really worked for me. 184 00:11:43,003 --> 00:11:47,762 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So I'm going to describe an ideal state that I'm approaching, like a limit. 185 00:11:47,762 --> 00:11:50,580 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You know, you never quite. It's a direction, 186 00:11:50,580 --> 00:11:53,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but it's not something you'll ever reach. 187 00:11:53,787 --> 00:11:57,790 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So here's my ideal state for a working life. Again, 188 00:11:57,790 --> 00:12:04,024 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I see them as a blend of the same person. I'm not a different person when I'm at 189 00:12:04,024 --> 00:12:08,873 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): work and when I'm at home. I'm the same person and how I carry 190 00:12:08,873 --> 00:12:10,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): myself matters. 191 00:12:10,147 --> 00:12:14,781 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And they bleed into each other. So for me, an ideal state is to feel connected to my 192 00:12:14,781 --> 00:12:17,234 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): work, to feel like what I'm doing matters on 193 00:12:17,234 --> 00:12:19,633 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): some level, to feel that I am contributing. 194 00:12:19,633 --> 00:12:22,359 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I want to feel connected to the people around me, 195 00:12:22,359 --> 00:12:26,393 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and I to some degree I want to feel passion and excitement about what I'm 196 00:12:26,393 --> 00:12:29,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): doing. Not all the time. That's not reasonable, but sometimes. 197 00:12:29,827 --> 00:12:33,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Times I want to feel invested in it and I want to feel a sense of belonging. 198 00:12:35,187 --> 00:12:39,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): O that for me is an ideal statement. I want to feel useful. 199 00:12:39,987 --> 00:12:43,986 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So if I had to boil all of it down to the one thing that made the biggest 200 00:12:43,986 --> 00:12:46,363 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): difference through lots of trial and error, 201 00:12:46,363 --> 00:12:50,200 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and then the rest of the talk is basically a whole bunch of individual 202 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:53,442 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): ideas that are all supporting or complimentary in some way. 203 00:12:53,442 --> 00:12:57,656 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The one thing that made the biggest difference to my lived experience is like 204 00:12:57,656 --> 00:12:59,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): whether I wanted to be here or not. 205 00:12:59,907 --> 00:13:04,629 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): That's that's really what this is about. What is the one chance that made the 206 00:13:04,629 --> 00:13:06,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): biggest difference? And it is this. 207 00:13:07,827 --> 00:13:12,229 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It is a decision that your work always matters unconditionally. 208 00:13:12,229 --> 00:13:17,593 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I mean like really unconditionally. I say that if my work were being built on 209 00:13:17,593 --> 00:13:21,375 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): an assembly line, at the end of the assembly line is a 210 00:13:21,375 --> 00:13:23,507 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): trash can or an incinerator if. 211 00:13:23,507 --> 00:13:27,715 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): What I did was immediately destroyed and no one ever knew about it. 212 00:13:27,715 --> 00:13:32,665 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So it's demonstrably having no impact outside of myself that even then it would 213 00:13:32,665 --> 00:13:37,491 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): have a net positive inherent value. So whether you see this as like a willful 214 00:13:37,491 --> 00:13:42,132 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): delusion or some sort of, you know, greater like metaphysical or spiritual 215 00:13:42,132 --> 00:13:42,627 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): meaning. 216 00:13:42,827 --> 00:13:46,071 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Doesn't matter. It works either way as long as you 217 00:13:46,071 --> 00:13:50,078 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): inherently make make the choice that what I do matters always. 218 00:13:50,078 --> 00:13:54,785 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is true outside of work too, but it was especially important to hold 219 00:13:54,785 --> 00:13:59,619 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): this belief at work and it made a fundamental difference in the way I carry 220 00:13:59,619 --> 00:14:00,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): myself because now. 221 00:14:02,267 --> 00:14:06,389 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): What I'm doing is not dependent on whether, well, is that something I enjoy? 222 00:14:06,389 --> 00:14:08,958 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Is this going to further my career? Is it easy? 223 00:14:08,958 --> 00:14:12,276 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Is it actually going to make a business impact? I don't know. 224 00:14:12,276 --> 00:14:15,863 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You can't always know that. There are things that are important to 225 00:14:15,863 --> 00:14:17,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): try, but you can't know. 226 00:14:17,427 --> 00:14:20,582 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And you have to try without knowing whether it will work. 227 00:14:20,582 --> 00:14:23,899 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There are so many ways to value whether work matters or not, 228 00:14:23,899 --> 00:14:27,543 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but almost all of them are conditional and external. And you know, 229 00:14:27,543 --> 00:14:30,317 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): in a sort of recursive base case sort of scenario, 230 00:14:30,317 --> 00:14:32,982 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): what happens when none of those things are true? 231 00:14:32,982 --> 00:14:36,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): They don't feel very true and you have to do it anyway. 232 00:14:36,907 --> 00:14:39,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Is there a way to feel like? 233 00:14:41,307 --> 00:14:43,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You're not wasting your life or your moments. 234 00:14:44,627 --> 00:14:47,448 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): By being at work, and for me, this is what it took. 235 00:14:47,448 --> 00:14:51,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Like this changed everything. It is an unconditional belief that. 236 00:14:52,027 --> 00:14:55,517 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): My work matters. So did that pull request actually, 237 00:14:55,517 --> 00:14:58,738 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you know, go through and result in some feature 238 00:14:58,738 --> 00:15:04,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): improvement to improve some metrics for customers? Did this bug fix actually work? 239 00:15:05,027 --> 00:15:08,570 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It's not. It's a fundamentally different premise 240 00:15:08,570 --> 00:15:13,630 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that Nope, that's not how it works. I have chosen and it is a choice. 241 00:15:13,630 --> 00:15:18,185 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I've chosen to care. My work matters and it has a net positive 242 00:15:18,185 --> 00:15:20,787 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): value no matter what. And this is a. 243 00:15:20,827 --> 00:15:24,702 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): A different world view that changes how you aroach everything because you no 244 00:15:24,702 --> 00:15:25,507 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): longer approach. 245 00:15:26,147 --> 00:15:28,811 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): What needs to be done, or what's important, 246 00:15:28,811 --> 00:15:33,473 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): or what feels important from a selfish belief that it depends on the outcome 247 00:15:33,473 --> 00:15:36,985 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): because you don't need it anymore. You may still want it, 248 00:15:36,985 --> 00:15:41,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you may still have a preference for things, but you don't need it to be true. 249 00:15:41,827 --> 00:15:47,061 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it it changes the way you approach everything. Yep. All right, so here we go. 250 00:15:47,061 --> 00:15:50,826 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): What worked for me? So we're going to skip through some of 251 00:15:50,826 --> 00:15:55,741 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): these slides pretty quickly so that we have time to get to the ones I missed 252 00:15:55,741 --> 00:15:56,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): before. 253 00:15:57,107 --> 00:16:00,102 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But I'll still, I'll cover them in brief. All right, 254 00:16:00,102 --> 00:16:04,454 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): so the small moments are not small. They're everything. This is saying that, 255 00:16:04,454 --> 00:16:07,958 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you know, most of our time is regular, boring, small moments, 256 00:16:07,958 --> 00:16:10,614 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and they make up everything, really. You know, 257 00:16:10,614 --> 00:16:14,513 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): peak experiences at the moment of achieving goals really aren't that 258 00:16:14,513 --> 00:16:16,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): important. They're important to add. 259 00:16:16,627 --> 00:16:20,159 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Aspects of ourselves, but we are way overweight in terms of how 260 00:16:20,159 --> 00:16:24,408 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): important those things are. In reality, we would be far better served paying 261 00:16:24,408 --> 00:16:28,436 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): attention to what is the quality of life and the value of an individual, 262 00:16:28,436 --> 00:16:32,850 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): relatively boring moment when nothing's going on, because that is ninety-eight, 263 00:16:32,850 --> 00:16:34,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): ninety-nine percent of your existence. 264 00:16:35,027 --> 00:16:39,842 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And that they're not small. And how you carry yourselves and how much 265 00:16:39,842 --> 00:16:45,139 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you invest meaning into those moments greatly determines the quality of your 266 00:16:45,139 --> 00:16:50,711 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): life and the quality of the the life of the people around you. That's customers, 267 00:16:50,711 --> 00:16:51,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): co-workers. 268 00:16:51,987 --> 00:16:56,391 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Friends, family, if you treat every small moment as if it 269 00:16:56,391 --> 00:17:01,933 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): is a big deal and that it is important how you carry yourself right now, 270 00:17:01,933 --> 00:17:03,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): it will change everything. 271 00:17:06,827 --> 00:17:11,131 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): OK, cool. This is a similar concept. This is simply the premise that as a 272 00:17:11,131 --> 00:17:14,563 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): general heuristic, you can either be leaning in or leaning 273 00:17:14,563 --> 00:17:18,634 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): away from every experience. You can't actually escape any experience. 274 00:17:18,634 --> 00:17:23,345 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You're here whether you like it or not. I would encourage you to instead of when 275 00:17:23,345 --> 00:17:26,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you notice you're leaning away, I'll keep that as a. 276 00:17:26,707 --> 00:17:29,623 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Rough, intuitive definition for now. Instead, 277 00:17:29,623 --> 00:17:32,792 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): do the exact opposite and try to lean in instead. 278 00:17:32,792 --> 00:17:36,406 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): We'll talk a little more about some more ideas in a bit. 279 00:17:36,406 --> 00:17:41,223 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This slide is important to cover, especially in age of large change and new 280 00:17:41,223 --> 00:17:42,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): categorical change. 281 00:17:42,787 --> 00:17:48,496 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I've started trying to navigate primarily using intuition and trust in that 282 00:17:48,496 --> 00:17:54,429 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): intuition rather than a bunch of left brain planning because it's very hard to 283 00:17:54,429 --> 00:17:59,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): do. We all have six months, 12 months, two year plans at every level and. 284 00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:03,876 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm of the opinion that this is largely not just useless, 285 00:18:03,876 --> 00:18:08,341 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but often a destructive exercise. When things are changing rapidly, 286 00:18:08,341 --> 00:18:11,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): it's simply not nimble enough, and it's often. 287 00:18:13,587 --> 00:18:16,847 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Creating bad outcomes. It's how we spend so much time, 288 00:18:16,847 --> 00:18:20,344 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): especially in engineering, trying to ask what can be done, 289 00:18:20,344 --> 00:18:23,960 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): what could be done. We spend very little time thinking about 290 00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,567 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): what is it actually like to live that life? 291 00:18:26,567 --> 00:18:29,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Do I actually want to live the existence I'm creating? 292 00:18:29,827 --> 00:18:34,029 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I think that is worth considering. Intuition never makes that mistake if you 293 00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:37,794 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): trust it and you follow it, and I find that it is a much more nimble 294 00:18:37,794 --> 00:18:40,850 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and agile way. Of course, you still have to think about 295 00:18:40,850 --> 00:18:44,725 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): consequences and planning it all out, how you're going to get it done, 296 00:18:44,725 --> 00:18:46,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but I encourage you to start. 297 00:18:46,307 --> 00:18:50,980 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Navigating by a felt sense of what seems like it matters, what feels important, 298 00:18:50,980 --> 00:18:53,667 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): even if it's not popular, and following that, 299 00:18:53,667 --> 00:18:56,412 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): at least for a while and seeing where it goes. 300 00:18:56,412 --> 00:19:00,968 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it hasn't really steered me wrong yet. It works at every level. I highly, 301 00:19:00,968 --> 00:19:03,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): highly recommend taking this approach. 302 00:19:03,747 --> 00:19:07,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Rather than trying to know how it will all workout and planning every step. 303 00:19:09,747 --> 00:19:13,810 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Briefly cover this. How you are was always more important 304 00:19:13,810 --> 00:19:17,872 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): than what you do. This has really helped me when deciding 305 00:19:17,872 --> 00:19:22,075 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): what to do. It's not clear. Sometimes it's still not clear. 306 00:19:22,075 --> 00:19:26,627 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I realized that this is a fallacy like the the premise is wrong. 307 00:19:26,987 --> 00:19:31,764 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): How I my disposition right now is always more important than whatever random task 308 00:19:31,764 --> 00:19:35,783 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): or plan I've set aside. It doesn't matter. Should I do this or that? 309 00:19:35,783 --> 00:19:39,977 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Should I work on this or that? Should I talk to this person or should I 310 00:19:39,977 --> 00:19:42,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): do this thing? It doesn't matter if I find myself. 311 00:19:43,387 --> 00:19:47,177 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Trapped in decisions. I have to take a step back and go. 312 00:19:47,177 --> 00:19:50,568 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Forget about that. Like get your head on straight. 313 00:19:50,568 --> 00:19:55,820 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Like change your the way you're orienting yourself to your work and to the the 314 00:19:55,820 --> 00:19:58,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): present moment. Lean in, basically. 315 00:19:58,147 --> 00:20:01,239 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): If you do that, everything else kind of works out. 316 00:20:01,239 --> 00:20:05,906 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Even if you're doing something dumb, like even you're doing a sort of menial 317 00:20:05,906 --> 00:20:09,361 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): task that it doesn't matter and you're still indecisive. 318 00:20:09,361 --> 00:20:14,513 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): If you simply change the way that you are oriented to the world to be more positive, 319 00:20:14,513 --> 00:20:17,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): open, engaged, sort of trusting, it's going to be fine. 320 00:20:18,187 --> 00:20:20,814 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Work out, often less thinking, more feeling. 321 00:20:20,814 --> 00:20:25,016 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It tends to lead somewhere more interesting, and usually not that long, 322 00:20:25,016 --> 00:20:29,160 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and you end up where you need to be. It's a sort of interesting quirk. 323 00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:33,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm sure you can take this to the extreme and really abuse the idea, 324 00:20:33,187 --> 00:20:34,587 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but you get the premise. 325 00:20:34,627 --> 00:20:35,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You get the premise. 326 00:20:36,347 --> 00:20:38,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right, so now we're into some new content. 327 00:20:41,467 --> 00:20:41,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So. 328 00:20:43,707 --> 00:20:48,513 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Our attention and by proxy, I think our energy is our most valuable 329 00:20:48,513 --> 00:20:54,095 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): commodity or valuable resource in the modern age for humanity. It's not money, 330 00:20:54,095 --> 00:20:57,841 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): it's not time. All of these things are derivative of 331 00:20:57,841 --> 00:20:58,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): attention. 332 00:20:58,627 --> 00:21:02,841 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And to again, to a degree, some sort of felt sense of energy. 333 00:21:02,841 --> 00:21:07,056 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And what you put your attention on is of critical importance. 334 00:21:07,056 --> 00:21:10,590 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): We really are our environments, and more than that, 335 00:21:10,590 --> 00:21:15,824 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): we are what we put our attention on. I live a pretty bizarre life for anyone 336 00:21:15,824 --> 00:21:16,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): who knows me. 337 00:21:16,947 --> 00:21:20,371 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I really don't. I don't consume any news media. 338 00:21:20,371 --> 00:21:25,151 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I do very little web browsing. I listen to almost no informational 339 00:21:25,151 --> 00:21:28,504 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): podcasts. I've withdrawn from a lot of things, 340 00:21:28,504 --> 00:21:32,356 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and I spend most of my time these days in meat space. 341 00:21:32,356 --> 00:21:36,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): That is the stuff and the people that are physically around. 342 00:21:36,707 --> 00:21:39,966 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Around me and you find that your brain starts to rewire. 343 00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:43,683 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): That is the default mode network. The part of your brain that is 344 00:21:43,683 --> 00:21:48,429 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): responsible for thinking and planning and mind wandering reflection tends to worry 345 00:21:48,429 --> 00:21:51,459 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): about stuff that is actually happening in your life. 346 00:21:51,459 --> 00:21:55,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And this has made a profound difference in my lived quality of experience. 347 00:21:55,827 --> 00:22:00,365 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): At work, at home, everywhere. And that I try to make sure that I spend 348 00:22:00,365 --> 00:22:04,647 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): time so it improves the quality of my default mode network uptime. 349 00:22:04,647 --> 00:22:09,824 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So that is the time I'm doing nothing. The quality of my thoughts are better and 350 00:22:09,824 --> 00:22:13,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): they're more relevant to what's actually happening. 351 00:22:14,147 --> 00:22:19,026 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it has made a huge difference. So if something is in your attention at 352 00:22:19,026 --> 00:22:22,603 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): all, to some degree, you eventually become that thing, 353 00:22:22,603 --> 00:22:27,026 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): whether you want to or not. We have this unfortunate belief that we 354 00:22:27,026 --> 00:22:28,587 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): can compensate for that. 355 00:22:29,227 --> 00:22:33,367 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But that is to a large degree not true, and that these things get in 356 00:22:33,367 --> 00:22:36,007 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): subconsciously, whether you want to or not. 357 00:22:36,007 --> 00:22:40,207 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So just be careful about what you let into your attention in any way, 358 00:22:40,207 --> 00:22:44,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): because eventually you're going to be permanently, enduringly altered by it. 359 00:22:48,147 --> 00:22:51,524 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right, so this is more a sort of a Buddhist 360 00:22:51,524 --> 00:22:55,605 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): philosophy yoga. And this is again a heuristic that don't 361 00:22:55,605 --> 00:23:00,037 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): try to fix the inside with the outside. That is your emotions, 362 00:23:00,037 --> 00:23:02,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): your your internal discomfort. 363 00:23:03,187 --> 00:23:06,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I really felt I should be at this place in my career. I really felt I should. 364 00:23:07,827 --> 00:23:10,833 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Have these sort of outcomes or whatever it is, right? 365 00:23:10,833 --> 00:23:14,561 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Those are all external things, but they're you're trying to fix an 366 00:23:14,561 --> 00:23:18,624 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): internal problem with an external change, and this is doomed to failure. 367 00:23:18,624 --> 00:23:21,239 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): These are like categorically different things. 368 00:23:21,239 --> 00:23:23,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You fix the inside with the inside. 369 00:23:23,347 --> 00:23:28,279 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): We'll talk about that in a minute, but this is just a general rule that has 370 00:23:28,279 --> 00:23:33,404 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): really helped me know on what level to solve a problem if I am unhappy about a 371 00:23:33,404 --> 00:23:36,454 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): situation, if I want to be doing or working on 372 00:23:36,454 --> 00:23:37,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): something else. 373 00:23:38,307 --> 00:23:43,399 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The real problem is the discomfort, right? It's not the actual situation. 374 00:23:43,399 --> 00:23:48,009 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And I recognize that if I try to fix it by changing my co-workers, 375 00:23:48,009 --> 00:23:53,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): by getting other people to change the situation to change, my job to change. 376 00:23:53,667 --> 00:23:58,662 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I am perpetuating a problem because now I need the world to be a specific way to be 377 00:23:58,662 --> 00:24:01,220 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): OK. So you cannot fix whether you're OK or 378 00:24:01,220 --> 00:24:06,215 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): not by changing the circumstances. Again, within reason. If you're covered in ants, 379 00:24:06,215 --> 00:24:10,972 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you should knock the ants off of you. Don't sit there saying that you can't fix 380 00:24:10,972 --> 00:24:11,507 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): the ants. 381 00:24:11,507 --> 00:24:15,755 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I can't fix the inside of the outside, but to some degree, 382 00:24:15,755 --> 00:24:20,291 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and generally speaking, once you've stopped trying to do this, 383 00:24:20,291 --> 00:24:22,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): pretty much anything's good. 384 00:24:23,507 --> 00:24:25,853 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So that brings us to the skill of letting go, 385 00:24:25,853 --> 00:24:29,677 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and I think there's one more slide after this and then we'll we'll move to 386 00:24:29,677 --> 00:24:30,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): questions. 387 00:24:31,627 --> 00:24:37,281 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This has been a really powerful skill for me and it works on retty much every level. 388 00:24:37,281 --> 00:24:42,535 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): O once you've decided I'm not going to try to fix inside problems with outside 389 00:24:42,535 --> 00:24:43,067 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): changes. 390 00:24:44,707 --> 00:24:48,975 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): How do you do that? A lot of that is done through just 391 00:24:48,975 --> 00:24:53,320 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): letting it go. If you you sort of intuitively know what 392 00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:57,509 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): this is like, if somebody makes you angry or they say 393 00:24:57,509 --> 00:25:00,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): something rude, you have a moment. 394 00:25:00,307 --> 00:25:06,407 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): After the reaction where it's no longer happening anymore and you've moved on and 395 00:25:06,407 --> 00:25:11,094 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): you can either let it go or you can allow it to keep stocking. 396 00:25:11,094 --> 00:25:16,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So we all sort of know what this is like for emotions. It works for. 397 00:25:16,387 --> 00:25:19,374 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Thoughts. It works for all sorts of problems, 398 00:25:19,374 --> 00:25:24,049 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): beliefs. It is a sort of internal, like relaxing of your grip, sort of, 399 00:25:24,049 --> 00:25:28,204 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and just no longer perpetuating a line of thinking or emotions. 400 00:25:28,204 --> 00:25:33,463 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it is an absolute master skill and just being aware that this is a skill you 401 00:25:33,463 --> 00:25:34,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): can practice. 402 00:25:34,387 --> 00:25:38,597 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): In literally everything. Oh, they didn't put chocolate syrup on my ice 403 00:25:38,597 --> 00:25:42,273 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): cream that I ordered. There's a chance to practice letting it 404 00:25:42,273 --> 00:25:44,882 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): go. You practice it at every level. Oh, OK, 405 00:25:44,882 --> 00:25:49,329 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): they didn't mention me in this this month's like team meeting or whatever. 406 00:25:49,329 --> 00:25:51,107 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There's a chance to let it go. 407 00:25:51,107 --> 00:25:56,126 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And it changes the way once you view this as a game you can play all the time, 408 00:25:56,126 --> 00:25:58,667 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): changes the way you approach everything. 409 00:26:00,907 --> 00:26:02,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So that brings us. 410 00:26:03,107 --> 00:26:07,385 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): To how to view discomfort and the urge to withdraw. 411 00:26:07,385 --> 00:26:13,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This one has been extremely helpful, especially in an age where people. 412 00:26:14,787 --> 00:26:18,560 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Human connection is not a given anymore. It's almost something we're recreating. 413 00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:22,099 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): For some people it's easier than others, but we have to, like, recreate it. 414 00:26:22,099 --> 00:26:24,567 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And when you do these things, of course it cascades. 415 00:26:24,567 --> 00:26:27,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Other people do the same thing and it changes the culture around you. 416 00:26:29,427 --> 00:26:33,783 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But I encourage you to start to view an internal sense of friction or tension in 417 00:26:33,783 --> 00:26:36,310 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): any action. Should I speak up in this meeting? 418 00:26:36,310 --> 00:26:40,396 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Should I say that building the, you know, running these automation tests or 419 00:26:40,396 --> 00:26:43,999 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): whatever is a complete waste of my time? Or refactoring, you know, 420 00:26:43,999 --> 00:26:45,827 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): this old legacy code base is dumb. 421 00:26:46,947 --> 00:26:52,637 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You have a moment of tension like, uh, you know what? I won't. Instead, 422 00:26:52,637 --> 00:26:58,564 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I encourage you to start viewing that initial moment of tension or fear or 423 00:26:58,564 --> 00:27:03,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): hesitancy again, or the urge to withdraw as a signpost for 424 00:27:03,227 --> 00:27:06,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): uh, here is a moment for personal growth. 425 00:27:06,627 --> 00:27:13,055 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Here's a challenge like and if you can move through it, I generally do it anyway. 426 00:27:13,055 --> 00:27:16,505 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Again, within reason. Don't do dumb things, 427 00:27:16,505 --> 00:27:22,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but you view this as a sign is like a game that you are playing in life. 428 00:27:22,307 --> 00:27:25,259 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And for me, like, if you do this long enough, 429 00:27:25,259 --> 00:27:28,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I've begun to see the world and my life in it as. 430 00:27:30,307 --> 00:27:35,416 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): A puzzle, basically. It's a it is basically just the purpose I 431 00:27:35,416 --> 00:27:41,578 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): ascribe to my life in part is that I am here for challenges to for personal 432 00:27:41,578 --> 00:27:47,254 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): growth and that whatever problem I'm struggling with at the moment is 433 00:27:47,254 --> 00:27:48,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): essentially. 434 00:27:48,227 --> 00:27:52,575 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The exact puzzle I need to be working on. It's always the one I need most, 435 00:27:52,575 --> 00:27:55,299 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): no matter what is wrong. If it's bothering me, 436 00:27:55,299 --> 00:28:00,052 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that's because this is an opportunity to overcome it and to make it not a problem 437 00:28:00,052 --> 00:28:02,834 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): anymore. That's the nice part is every time you 438 00:28:02,834 --> 00:28:07,587 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): face these moments of discomfort or the urge to withdraw and you make it through. 439 00:28:07,667 --> 00:28:10,545 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is classic cognitive behavioral psychology. 440 00:28:10,545 --> 00:28:13,657 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It becomes easier from then on. You become stronger. 441 00:28:13,657 --> 00:28:18,297 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It literally doesn't bother you as much anymore until it doesn't bother you at 442 00:28:18,297 --> 00:28:20,881 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): all. And what used to hurt is now painless, 443 00:28:20,881 --> 00:28:23,347 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and then you don't even notice it anymore. 444 00:28:23,427 --> 00:28:27,114 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So I would encourage you to view discomfort as a sort of game. 445 00:28:27,114 --> 00:28:29,865 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You don't always have to take the opportunity, 446 00:28:29,865 --> 00:28:34,254 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but each one is an opportunity to make your life a little bit easier and a 447 00:28:34,254 --> 00:28:35,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): little bit richer. 448 00:28:37,187 --> 00:28:42,299 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I think this is the last slide and that is the most important how to be values 449 00:28:42,299 --> 00:28:45,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): are unconditional. So just like I talked about believing 450 00:28:45,987 --> 00:28:51,033 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that your work has unconditionally matters. What I do matters just full stop. 451 00:28:51,033 --> 00:28:53,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It doesn't matter. No other outcomes. 452 00:28:54,147 --> 00:28:57,387 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And determine whether it was worth doing or not. 453 00:28:58,547 --> 00:29:03,460 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There are many other unconditional values that are also worth adopting, 454 00:29:03,460 --> 00:29:09,124 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and this is how at least I've had a major change in my quality of life and I think 455 00:29:09,124 --> 00:29:14,583 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): in the quality of my work and what I'm willing to do by adhering more to seeing 456 00:29:14,583 --> 00:29:18,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): my life less as a thing I plan out and I'm trying to. 457 00:29:18,547 --> 00:29:22,392 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Get right to a series of things that are happening to me, 458 00:29:22,392 --> 00:29:27,762 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): just like a stream flowing through me. My job is basically just to react well in 459 00:29:27,762 --> 00:29:31,606 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): every situation, and that one of the best ways to do that 460 00:29:31,606 --> 00:29:34,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): is with general unconditional values heuristic so. 461 00:29:35,267 --> 00:29:38,948 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It is a decision to be unconditionally happy. That's a little hard. 462 00:29:38,948 --> 00:29:42,304 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Unconditionally OK. It is a that you can decide these things. 463 00:29:42,304 --> 00:29:46,689 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I can care about my work unconditionally, and there are many others that you can 464 00:29:46,689 --> 00:29:49,233 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): visit and this is not unconditional gratitude. 465 00:29:49,233 --> 00:29:53,563 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And these are just reminders of how to be in every moment and that I have found 466 00:29:53,563 --> 00:29:55,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): that framing my life this way. 467 00:29:55,267 --> 00:29:59,463 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It makes every moment, especially the small, boring ones, 468 00:29:59,463 --> 00:30:05,179 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): significantly easier and much richer. And so I would encourage you to start at 469 00:30:05,179 --> 00:30:10,026 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): least experimenting with, rather than setting traditional goals to 470 00:30:10,026 --> 00:30:11,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): get what you want in life. 471 00:30:12,067 --> 00:30:16,351 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Try viewing life as a thing that is continually happening right here and now. 472 00:30:16,351 --> 00:30:19,866 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And then, for the most part, your goals are to try to adhere to 473 00:30:19,866 --> 00:30:23,436 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): important unconditional values, unconditional love, do whatever. 474 00:30:23,436 --> 00:30:26,018 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Pick whichever few make the most sense to you. 475 00:30:26,018 --> 00:30:30,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And now your goal in every moment is to react according to those values. 476 00:30:30,827 --> 00:30:35,606 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And see how profoundly it changes you and how you interact with everybody. 477 00:30:35,606 --> 00:30:40,448 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I think we'll end it there. There we go. Yeah, QA. So I'll end the sharing. 478 00:30:40,448 --> 00:30:44,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Does anyone have questions or comments? I know it's a long monologue. 479 00:30:56,187 --> 00:31:00,223 Prosceno, Chris (CAI - Atlanta): Hey, Stephen, I just wanted to quickly say thank you 480 00:31:00,223 --> 00:31:04,411 Prosceno, Chris (CAI - Atlanta): for this session. Very rare that we have these type of 481 00:31:04,411 --> 00:31:10,427 Prosceno, Chris (CAI - Atlanta): opportunities to have these types of discussions and deep meaning discussions. 482 00:31:10,947 --> 00:31:16,227 Prosceno, Chris (CAI - Atlanta): And I I'd hope that you can take this on the road on a road show through Cox Auto. 483 00:31:17,587 --> 00:31:18,347 Prosceno, Chris (CAI - Atlanta): Thank you. 484 00:31:17,827 --> 00:31:21,431 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I I wouldn't know who to talk to, but yeah, 485 00:31:21,431 --> 00:31:27,902 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): if you've got ideas for people want to hear the same talk again, by all means. 486 00:31:27,902 --> 00:31:29,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Thank you for saying so. 487 00:31:32,987 --> 00:31:33,387 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Hey, Josh. 488 00:31:33,907 --> 00:31:39,060 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): Hey, Stephen. Long time, no chat. First, thanks. I thought this was great. 489 00:31:39,060 --> 00:31:44,487 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): I had one question that that popped into my head while you were while you were 490 00:31:44,487 --> 00:31:49,227 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): talking. So you know, you mentioned, you know, kind of being on a a. 491 00:31:50,307 --> 00:31:56,214 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): Like a a bit of a low information diet, you know, which I totally, 492 00:31:56,214 --> 00:31:58,947 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): I totally understand. And then. 493 00:32:00,067 --> 00:32:05,931 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): And then also like that moment when something happens of pulling of like 494 00:32:05,931 --> 00:32:10,992 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): wanting to pull away. And then there's kind of a triangle here 495 00:32:10,992 --> 00:32:15,009 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): for me, the velocity at which everything seems to 496 00:32:15,009 --> 00:32:19,587 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): be changing these days. How do you find balance between? 497 00:32:19,667 --> 00:32:26,061 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): Not wanting to pull away, being on low information and still kind 498 00:32:26,061 --> 00:32:27,707 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): of able to adapt. 499 00:32:30,547 --> 00:32:36,508 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): When the large language models really started popping off before the ChatGPT 3. 500 00:32:36,508 --> 00:32:42,393 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): 5 APII was like connected and a little after that maybe too hyper connected to 501 00:32:42,393 --> 00:32:46,938 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): the advancements. You know, every stupid Twitter influencer, 502 00:32:46,938 --> 00:32:50,067 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): literally anybody who had anything to say. 503 00:32:50,147 --> 00:32:53,963 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Just diving into all the old AI channels that I looked at. 504 00:32:53,963 --> 00:32:59,137 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I was just drinking from the fire hose and at some point I realized I have more 505 00:32:59,137 --> 00:33:03,276 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): information that I know what to do with. I'm not processing it, 506 00:33:03,276 --> 00:33:07,610 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I'm not actually using it. And then I began to change my heuristic 507 00:33:07,610 --> 00:33:10,067 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): for what to pay attention to based on. 508 00:33:10,267 --> 00:33:14,437 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Basically self-reflection of am I actually using the information I'm 509 00:33:14,437 --> 00:33:17,761 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): getting? Because if I'm not, it's actively detracting. 510 00:33:17,761 --> 00:33:21,326 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It is like polluting like the work my subconscious can do. 511 00:33:21,326 --> 00:33:25,375 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It is creating noise in my life. It's definitely stressing me out. 512 00:33:25,375 --> 00:33:29,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And I found that I kept reeling it back, basically less and less and less. 513 00:33:29,907 --> 00:33:34,993 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Until I got to a point where it's like I can check in like on topics I care about 514 00:33:34,993 --> 00:33:38,095 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): once a week, once every two weeks and feel like I 515 00:33:38,095 --> 00:33:41,072 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): didn't miss anything. And now when I come back, 516 00:33:41,072 --> 00:33:45,972 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I have much more energy to go in depth and I spend a lot more time doing stuff 517 00:33:45,972 --> 00:33:49,507 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and I found that I had more to share and I learned more. 518 00:33:49,827 --> 00:33:52,432 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): By yeah, every now and then doing a surface check 519 00:33:52,432 --> 00:33:56,548 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): for what seemed interesting and but then I would go very deep and then I would 520 00:33:56,548 --> 00:34:00,767 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): insist on using that information in some way and that if I wasn't getting enough 521 00:34:00,767 --> 00:34:04,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): any information to do something with for long enough, I took that as a sign for. 522 00:34:05,187 --> 00:34:07,594 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You know, this is basically vapid and I kind of 523 00:34:07,594 --> 00:34:11,404 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): just wanted the dopamine hit or I felt like I was having FOMO or something. 524 00:34:11,404 --> 00:34:14,211 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So I reeled it way back and haven't regretted it since. 525 00:34:14,211 --> 00:34:16,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): We'll hope that answers your question there. 526 00:34:16,067 --> 00:34:18,427 Reddick, Josh (CAI - Atlanta): Yeah, yeah, I think it does. Thanks. 527 00:34:20,227 --> 00:34:24,054 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Just try it. I think it'll surprise you how little is 528 00:34:24,054 --> 00:34:25,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): actually useful. 529 00:34:27,347 --> 00:34:32,727 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Anyone else? Questions. Comments. Got better ideas? I'm just one guy, 530 00:34:32,727 --> 00:34:38,107 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): so if you have other approaches that you want to share, by all means. 531 00:34:41,827 --> 00:34:44,928 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): I have a question, not an approach. How do you, 532 00:34:43,867 --> 00:34:44,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Sure. 533 00:34:44,928 --> 00:34:48,480 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): what does this daily practice look like for you? Like, 534 00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:53,518 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): are there certain touchstones that you have within your day that you're like, 535 00:34:53,518 --> 00:34:56,360 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): Oh yes, this is because it's so easy to get 536 00:34:56,360 --> 00:34:57,587 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): distracted of like. 537 00:34:57,987 --> 00:35:00,474 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): I am. I have so much experience doing things in 538 00:35:00,474 --> 00:35:03,738 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): ways I don't want to, right? So when you start a new behavior, 539 00:35:03,738 --> 00:35:06,950 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): it helps to have a little touch tone on what that looks like. 540 00:35:06,950 --> 00:35:09,747 Lassiter, Beth (CAI - Atlanta): So I was wondering what that looks like in your life. 541 00:35:12,067 --> 00:35:18,440 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But for me, like I keep it simple. I have. I have a lot of systems and I've sort of 542 00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:23,448 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): torn a lot of them down. It's like self reform, self-improvement, 543 00:35:23,448 --> 00:35:28,227 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): junkie. I still do it, but now I just have less rigid systems. 544 00:35:28,307 --> 00:35:32,262 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I still have my spreadsheet that has all of my like rules and like habits and 545 00:35:32,262 --> 00:35:34,847 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): stuff in it. I don't really look at this very much 546 00:35:34,847 --> 00:35:37,382 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): anymore. So now it's distilled down to just a few 547 00:35:37,382 --> 00:35:40,373 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): things to remember, and the most important of which that's 548 00:35:40,373 --> 00:35:44,124 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): relevant to this is meditation. I do at least an hour of meditation every 549 00:35:44,124 --> 00:35:47,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): day, sometimes up to two, depends on whether I can fit it in. 550 00:35:47,347 --> 00:35:51,086 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): What's going on? But this is, you don't have to do that much, 551 00:35:51,086 --> 00:35:56,092 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but I I do that because it has made such a profound effect on my lived experience. 552 00:35:56,092 --> 00:36:01,037 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): The half-life of feeling good after that is incredible and it that's what gets me 553 00:36:01,037 --> 00:36:03,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): back to zero, like a reset point. 554 00:36:03,587 --> 00:36:07,326 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Of oh, my nervous system is good. Like I'm fine staring at a wall. 555 00:36:07,326 --> 00:36:11,622 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And that's really the benchmark is if you can't sit in a chair. I literally, 556 00:36:11,622 --> 00:36:14,803 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I call this the chair test again, just to remind myself, 557 00:36:14,803 --> 00:36:18,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): if I can't sit in a chair and stare at a wall for 5 minutes and not be OK. 558 00:36:19,187 --> 00:36:23,263 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Then I'm not OK. Like, that's the problem. It's it's on the inside, like, 559 00:36:23,263 --> 00:36:26,733 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and that's what I need to do. Amusingly, that is also the fix, 560 00:36:26,733 --> 00:36:31,029 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): is to just sit in the chair until you're good. And it doesn't take that long. 561 00:36:31,029 --> 00:36:34,829 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And then you approach the rest of the day fundamentally differently. 562 00:36:34,829 --> 00:36:36,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So that is a huge cornerstone for me. 563 00:36:37,107 --> 00:36:40,664 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Even and it. So I began to see meditation less as a 564 00:36:40,664 --> 00:36:44,083 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): sense of something to do, like another checklist, 565 00:36:44,083 --> 00:36:48,871 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): another thing I have to do. But I began to really internalize it as a 566 00:36:48,871 --> 00:36:52,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): way to remember what it's like to be normal and OK. 567 00:36:53,067 --> 00:36:57,555 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And content no matter what is happening. And then that becomes a sort of set point 568 00:36:57,555 --> 00:36:58,907 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): for everything else I do. 569 00:37:03,667 --> 00:37:06,620 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I don't know if that fully answers your question, 570 00:37:06,620 --> 00:37:11,168 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but the rest of this stuff is like keeping it top of mind and a lot of it is 571 00:37:11,168 --> 00:37:14,594 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): just done in the moment. They're pretty simple practices. 572 00:37:14,594 --> 00:37:18,137 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I like the journal, but it's really not a list of things to 573 00:37:18,137 --> 00:37:20,027 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): do so much it is you have to be. 574 00:37:20,547 --> 00:37:23,382 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): To hold the belief and believe it is worth doing. 575 00:37:23,382 --> 00:37:27,634 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And then life gives you the practice. It's not like an extra thing you do. 576 00:37:27,634 --> 00:37:31,489 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You can keep going to meetings, you can keep going in the elevator. 577 00:37:31,489 --> 00:37:35,854 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You can keep filling out time sheets, like do all the things you already do, 578 00:37:35,854 --> 00:37:36,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but now. 579 00:37:36,547 --> 00:37:40,662 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There's this added layer of a game that you're playing with yourself, 580 00:37:40,662 --> 00:37:44,482 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): where you're trying to bring these values into all of your work. 581 00:37:44,482 --> 00:37:47,950 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): You're trying to lean in heavily and do something quality. 582 00:37:47,950 --> 00:37:51,947 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Not because anyone makes you to, not because you expect an outcome. 583 00:37:52,707 --> 00:37:57,592 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Because it's a sort of game with yourself, because you have to be here one way or 584 00:37:57,592 --> 00:37:58,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): another and. 585 00:37:59,947 --> 00:38:02,568 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It's sort of more fun and more interesting, right? 586 00:38:02,568 --> 00:38:06,217 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It's not an extra thing you do. It's a it's a different way of viewing 587 00:38:06,217 --> 00:38:08,067 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and doing the things you already do. 588 00:38:14,907 --> 00:38:15,387 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Cool. 589 00:38:18,067 --> 00:38:21,253 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Any other questions or comments? Don't feel like you got to stick around. 590 00:38:21,253 --> 00:38:23,147 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I think we're we're at a bad time here, so. 591 00:38:25,507 --> 00:38:30,753 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): Hey Stephen, I I joined late, but I like what I I I like what I heard 592 00:38:30,753 --> 00:38:36,074 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): during the time that I did join. Like I cut out social media like many 593 00:38:36,074 --> 00:38:41,620 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): years ago and I'd find that I'm not distracted really by much of anything 594 00:38:41,620 --> 00:38:44,467 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): besides what I I want to focus on and. 595 00:38:44,467 --> 00:38:50,759 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): I think I'm definitely not as maybe practiced as as you are in some of the 596 00:38:50,759 --> 00:38:57,050 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): some of your your daily practices, but when I I think when I when I when I 597 00:38:57,050 --> 00:39:01,747 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): realized that things are gonna happen regardless of of. 598 00:39:01,867 --> 00:39:08,026 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): What I what I do or there's some level of of acceptance or I can only control my 599 00:39:08,026 --> 00:39:12,209 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): own reactions, not other others reactions to a certain 600 00:39:12,209 --> 00:39:17,227 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): situation like it certainly allows you to like step back and not. 601 00:39:17,587 --> 00:39:21,667 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): Be like emotionally heated in any sort of moment. 602 00:39:24,747 --> 00:39:29,253 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Yeah, that's the way. I don't think you give yourself enough 603 00:39:29,253 --> 00:39:35,162 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): credit. That's and yet you're never done. But it's it's just a different way of 604 00:39:35,162 --> 00:39:38,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): viewing life I think we would all benefit from. 605 00:39:39,667 --> 00:39:43,583 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Being more careful about what we choose to care about. I mean, paradoxically, 606 00:39:43,583 --> 00:39:46,445 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): I think that we're taking in so much information. Again, 607 00:39:46,445 --> 00:39:50,109 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): like I mentioned with attention, like you cannot help but care about it. 608 00:39:50,109 --> 00:39:53,774 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): This is how the human brain works. If it if it's coming in the aperture, 609 00:39:53,774 --> 00:39:56,987 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): it's affecting you on some level and probably quite profoundly. 610 00:39:57,427 --> 00:39:59,808 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And so the less, the tighter your aperture, 611 00:39:59,808 --> 00:40:02,459 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): like the more caring you can give to everything. 612 00:40:02,459 --> 00:40:06,787 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Like whether you're going to a Little League game or you're just like writing a 613 00:40:06,787 --> 00:40:10,412 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): report or whatever you're doing, they may seem like small moments, 614 00:40:10,412 --> 00:40:13,387 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): but you have more capacity to care about those things. 615 00:40:13,827 --> 00:40:18,805 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): And you know, again, paradoxically, those are the most important things in 616 00:40:18,805 --> 00:40:23,783 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): your life. It is small, boring moments. That's basically almost all it is. 617 00:40:23,783 --> 00:40:26,770 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): But it kind of stops being small and boring, 618 00:40:26,770 --> 00:40:31,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and it does get imbued with this extra like weight of meaning and purpose. 619 00:40:31,947 --> 00:40:35,780 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): As you withdraw from the things that really didn't matter to you, 620 00:40:35,780 --> 00:40:39,380 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): and you don't need to feel any guilt about doing that either. 621 00:40:39,380 --> 00:40:42,747 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So sounds like you're doing a good job to me. Keep it up. 622 00:40:41,827 --> 00:40:45,707 Irwin, Jeremy (CAI - Utah): I like your talk. Good Good work. Thank you. 623 00:40:50,627 --> 00:40:52,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Anybody else? 624 00:40:54,947 --> 00:40:57,427 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Questions, comments or there's some chat? 625 00:40:59,587 --> 00:41:01,876 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Cool. I was probably more peppy in the first 626 00:41:01,876 --> 00:41:04,267 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): talk. I guess giving two is pretty tiring, so. 627 00:41:04,907 --> 00:41:07,492 Davis, Andrew (CAI - Burlington): It is tiring. Thanks for doing it back-to-back. 628 00:41:07,492 --> 00:41:09,107 Davis, Andrew (CAI - Burlington): I really appreciate the topic. 629 00:41:09,787 --> 00:41:09,867 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Oh. 630 00:41:10,427 --> 00:41:11,067 Davis, Andrew (CAI - Burlington): Well done. 631 00:41:11,467 --> 00:41:11,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Uh. 632 00:41:11,947 --> 00:41:16,972 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): Hey, Stephen, and I'll let the group know. I actually attended your first session, 633 00:41:14,347 --> 00:41:14,467 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Yeah. 634 00:41:16,972 --> 00:41:20,544 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): enjoyed it so much. And when you said in the first session 635 00:41:20,544 --> 00:41:24,297 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): you were going to cover some of the second-half of the stuff, 636 00:41:24,297 --> 00:41:28,777 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): I wanted to join the second session. So I want to at least tell the group 637 00:41:28,777 --> 00:41:29,987 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): that's watching now. 638 00:41:30,067 --> 00:41:34,421 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): I hope both of your recordings are available because if they are, 639 00:41:34,421 --> 00:41:39,500 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): I would encourage you guys to watch his first talk as well because there was 640 00:41:39,500 --> 00:41:44,513 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): there's a little bit of different talk and there was also some great Q& 641 00:41:44,513 --> 00:41:48,932 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): A session at the end of it. So I I think this is this is what been 642 00:41:48,932 --> 00:41:49,987 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): one of the best. 643 00:41:50,067 --> 00:41:55,107 Miller, Jay (CAI - Mission): One of the best topics I've enjoyed very much, so thanks for putting it up. 644 00:41:57,227 --> 00:42:01,123 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Absolutely. Thanks, Jay. I appreciate that. Yeah, take it, 645 00:42:01,123 --> 00:42:04,557 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): make it better. It's just that's how culture works. 646 00:42:04,557 --> 00:42:08,849 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): It's just one person. So I think everyone's got their own ideas, 647 00:42:08,849 --> 00:42:12,151 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): their own spinning, important iterations on life. 648 00:42:12,151 --> 00:42:16,707 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): So I encourage hopefully everybody else to to share their ideas too. 649 00:42:16,787 --> 00:42:19,930 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): That's what makes it work. There was somebody who had a hand up. 650 00:42:19,930 --> 00:42:22,347 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Was it Chris? I don't know if they're still here. 651 00:42:24,147 --> 00:42:25,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Oh well. 652 00:42:29,147 --> 00:42:29,307 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): No. 653 00:42:30,907 --> 00:42:31,547 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): All right. 654 00:42:32,587 --> 00:42:36,927 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): There's no further questions. I'm going to end the recording. 655 00:42:36,927 --> 00:42:38,187 Schrembeck, Steven (CAI - Atlanta): Thanks for coming.